Once upon a time there was a girl and a boy who shared a cubicle. The girl loved movies about vampires. The boy loved movies about baseball. The girl liked to point out that baseball was incredibly boring. The boy liked to tell the girl that vampires that sparkle in the sunlight was the stupidest thing he’d ever heard. And then, well, everything went downhill.
Finally, after months of name-calling and hair pulling, they decided that they needed to settle their debate once and for all. And so, in a moment of inspiration, the girl came up with the one true movie bracket. One bracket to rule them all. One bracket to find them. One bracket to bring them all and in the darkness bind them. (The boy also happens to love fantasy books that feature hobbits. The girl? Not so much. Really, the only thing these two can agree on is an affinity for Bill Nighy movies and chocolate pecan pie.)
They agreed on four separate categories – categories that would highlight recent top DVD releases. The girl, inspired in no small part by Twilight: Breaking Dawn, Part II (and, even though the sparkle factor is at a minimum, The Hobbit), picked “Books to Movies.” And, because Argo won the Oscar for Best Motion Picture of the Year and deserved recognition, the girl paid homage to the film with her second category, “Movie Beards.”
The boy, without a recent baseball movie to base a bracket on, went for his second love: “Best Star Wars Movie.” The girl said he couldn’t do that because there weren’t enough Star Wars movies to make a list. The boy told the girl that Robert Pattinson was ugly. The girl said that had nothing to do with Star Wars and that the boy was being immature. The boy said that he was sorry and decided to do a bracket of “Musical Movies,” to celebrate today’s release of Les Miserables on DVD. Being a good company man, he also picked “Civil War Movies” in honor of SJCPL’s One Book, One Michiana selection, The Killer Angels. (Available now in a variety of formats!)
Starting on Monday, March 25th the boy and the girl will whittle their brackets down. On Tuesday, they’ll unveil the Sweet 16. On Wednesday, the Elite Eight. On Thursday, The Final Four. On Friday, the, um, Tremendous Two. And on Monday, April 1st, the same day some big basketball tournament wraps up, the boy and the girl will announce the champion of the Movie Madness Tournament.
How will they decide? Advanced statistics, gut instinct, coin flips, who knows? Check back every day next week to find out. And please send in your thoughts, suggestions, and chocolate pecan pies.